The child does not want to kindergarten

I do not want to kindergarten!  Photo from

"I do not want children in the self-and-a-d! I will not go-oo-oo-oo! ". These heart-rending cries you hear now every morning. Sometimes the plaintive cries cries added on to the fact that the precious chadushka tummy ache, headache and general vomits from the garden. In the literal and figurative sense of the word. In more severe cases, the child is indeed a fever, aching stomach and worsen chronic diseases.

What do you do in this situation? To begin to understand why your baby for any price does not agree to join a group of children. A reason for this may be several.

Changing lifestyles

Children — the greatest in the world conservatives. It is only at first glance it seems that they are constantly striving for new adventures and experiences. In fact, the rhythm, they definitely know how one event follows another, — this is law and order in their lives. And then — my mother in the morning assigns an unfamiliar aunt, where, except for you, a loved one, it turns out, a bunch of other kids, throw it to its fate and it is unknown whether the Marketing Authorisation with her ever again. The garden is all someone else's — and probably so hostile.


Gradually accustom the baby to regime change. If he is used to going to bed late and wake up late, have to carefully translate the crumbs to an earlier recovery. That is not terrible, regime change occurs within 3-4 days.

When dramatically changing the way of life, it is important to keep the child, "a piece of home." The best option — if you can negotiate with the head teacher and that can be present in the group with the child during the first week. By the way, many kindergartens practice such contracts on a completely formal manner, and in a Waldorf kindergarten teachers themselves persistently asking her mother to be in a group with your child for at least ten days.

If it is not possible for some reason, think about some nice little things that will remind you of home crumbs. This can be a stuffed animal (it's so nice to sleep together!), Familiar food in a small container (preferably not get dirty — suitable carrot or apple). Or, you might want to do for your baby good luck charm — for example, a small flat-toy, which can always carry in the pocket or on a lanyard. When her little master become sad, let him remember the "magic talisman", and that will certainly help to cope with the gloomy thoughts.

Unusual food

Remember your childhood — probably in your kindergarten was a special "masterpiece" of local chefs who called you is not the most pleasant feeling. The notorious foam from milk, jelly, milk porridge or soup with onion — each has its own memories. Sometimes caregivers too zealously trying to feed their charges, require eat every crumb at a rapid pace — this is not everyone's strength.


If your baby refuses to eat in kindergarten, agree with the teachers that they did not insist on this process. In the end, still no baby on their own did not die of hunger. At home, the garden, it is possible to do without breakfast — more likely that by the time breakfast in the garden kid will have time to get hungry and want to try something with a common table.

If Sadowski rules a child is allowed to take some food from home, then let it be beautifully sliced fruits (apples, pears), vegetables (cucumber or carrot), and a banana suit. Try not to give your child sweets like candy or cookies, these goodies, of course, can console for the first time, but will cause unhealthy excitement in the team and will ruin your appetite.

Least favorite teacher

This is a serious problem, and ideally it would be good to decide before the child enters children's garden. No wonder that psychologists recommend that before you determine the baby in a particular institution, be sure to get acquainted not only with the head and with a set of toys in the group, but also (and more importantly!) With a future teacher. She will spend with your child most of the time. Sometimes it happens that one educator to children literally fly at full speed, and even to the other approach does not want to press close to my mother.


To start, find out why your kid does not like governess. This is not so easy, because not always a small child can tell us about your impressions and experiences. But you will come to the aid of a special game. In the evening, in a tranquil setting and play with the baby in the nursery with a set of small animals or plush plastic men. You will learn a lot of interesting details! Let baby own choice for the role — whether he will play for himself, for his "classmates" and for the most governess.

When you are clear about the meaning of the conflict for themselves, try to discuss it with the teacher. If after this there will be no positive change (teacher abused a child does not hear it, let the other kids tease and hurt your baby), the situation is, unfortunately, a dead-end. We'll have to think about changing the kindergarten or group. And, in this case, is preferable to change the garden than the group because at least there is some collective corporate ethics — including, and in kindergarten.

Odd man out

Sometimes it happens that the child, for some reason does not fit the children's group, continuing to stand apart. This may be a specific feature — just different in every child needs to communicate, someone needs to communicate more, some cost a minimum of "business relations." But if your child throughout the year and has not won in the children's group of the niche, spent all that time as a "behind the glass wall", just watching the children's lives, should see a psychologist — it can say about the nature of autistic features.


If the child is difficult to make friends with peers who have, as always, to take matters into their own hands. Try to gradually expand the circle of friends (like his own, and children). Observe who is the most likable of the classmates your child and try to make friends with his parents. More often invite them to visit. Perhaps, at first, you will have the most active part in their games to your "dikarenok" gradually and he could join them.

Another important point of transition — to make the kid to the idea that not only always with his mother he can be comfortable and fun. Ask your dad or grandma in your absence to come up with a child an exciting game. Not a bad option — studio early development, where children are being added to the children's group, without losing the connection to my mother. Other children and their games should be from your point of view, a very attractive and enjoyable experience. Pay attention to the baby on the way the children and have fun fun together, how great they are playing.

What you can not do

  • Succumb to persuasion and provocation. If you, in spite of all the children's plaintive moans and lamentations, yet brought the child to the door of the kindergarten, but at the last moment of your parental heart failed and you turned back together with your child — it is a very dangerous path. The kid will understand that the tears and cry, he will be able to achieve the desired, and the next time he will only slightly increase the volume and intensity of crying.
  • Drive the child into the garden after a day or a couple times a week. In order to kindergarten was inevitable given, a child should appear there every day (of course, except for weekends). It is better to first take him out of there early. Do not worry if the first few weeks or months you will not leave it there for a nap. Only when the child is fully adapted to the new conditions of life, try to pick it up after a nap.
  • By the fear of separation from t
    he child. Children unusually sensitive. Them on some level, transferred all of our emotions — and anxiety, and calm. Heartbreaking scene with tears in the locker room — not the best start to the day for your baby. Let go of the child with the confidence that he'll be all right.

Inessa Smyk

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