The nature of children: older and younger

We starinushki three sons.  Photo from http://creative.gettyimages.com

Remember the famous fairy story, as to the princess turns woos three brothers as they pass various tests to ensure that one of them was a happy husband, beautiful, and at the same time — and inherited half of the kingdom?

Fabulous beauty in such a situation usually prefer younger brother, who at first glance, everything seemed dumb. And as is the case in life? Does birth order on family life, nature, relationships? American psychologist RW Richardson made his classification of typical siblings.

Who's first?

Another grandfather Freud once remarked that "the position of the child among siblings is crucial in all of his subsequent life." It is known, for example, that the older children in the family often take a leadership role, they are focused on achievement. Younger is more communicative, it is easier to adapt to different situations in life. According to the rules of combinatorics, the positions are not so much.

Oldest child can be: the older brother of brothers, sisters, older brother, older sister of sisters, the older sister of brothers. Similar functions — the youngest child. There is still the position of the average child, and the only twins.

However, when a large difference in children aged (more than 5-6 years), each of them close to their characteristics to a single child. For example, if a family of a girl, and after eight years — the boy, the girl's character will be closer to "the only daughter in the family," but it will be present features of the "older sister of brothers."

We want to emphasize that this description — a probability. That is, usually people are just like that, but they do not have to fully comply with all of that or other characteristics. And so the task of this description — help to find out why we are, and what the rest of the family are not like us. Other things being equal, some couples get along better with each other just because of their role positions complement each other. For example, the younger sister of brothers usually tends to the older brother of sisters, they are most comfortable with. They know how they should behave with each other, often already at the first meeting they feel that they have long been familiar with each other, since they fall into a familiar situation.

Will develop a more complex relationship with his older sister and older brother, sisters brothers. They both used to be older, to have unquestioned authority, and none of them had any experience of relations "as equals". Conflicts on "Who's the Boss?" Inevitable. But knowing about it, such conflicts are easier to control.

The older children

Oldest child is usually much like a parent — a sort of a small little mom or dad. And they often take on the role the teacher, take responsibility and seek to lead. More than half of U.S. presidents were older sons, 21 of the 23 U.S. astronauts were the first or only sons in the family. The senior is focused on high achievement, up to the manic (Hitler, for example, also was the oldest child in the family).

For the older child's personality development is important, who was born after him — brothers, sisters, or both. For example, if the boy has a younger brother and sister, then his character will combine the features of the older brother of brothers and sisters, an older brother.

The older sister of sisters

Usually it is a bright, strong and independent person who is able to take care of yourself and, of others. For any reason, she has an opinion, and it hardly takes the help and advice of other people. The more she nurses, the less the chance of a successful marriage: it seeks to arrange the lives of others first, so that on its own at times neither the time nor the energy remains.

Ideal partner: the younger brother of the sisters, who often stay close to a strong woman. May recognize her leadership and the younger brother of the brothers, and the only son, who is set to equal communication and perceives it as a mother.

Complex relationships: his older brother brothers. Both aspire to leadership, and constantly share power.

Best Friends: usually lower and middle sister. With her older sister, they will probably find a lot to do, but it's only until such time as they have nothing to share.

The older sister of brothers

Man for her — a "favorite toy". It is able to sacrifice his job to take care of her husband. This often replaces the man's wife's mother — so much so that the proper marital relations are secondary.

Ideal partner: the younger brother of sisters. Everybody is happy: she is, whom to bring up, it is on whom to blame.

Complex relationships: his older brother brothers. By the way, when in a family there are children, they often relieve tension in the marriage fight for the lead. After all, both parents love it when there are younger.

Best Friends: As in the previous case, it's lower and middle sister. Not bad are relations with only daughters.

The elder brother of brothers

Of these boys are usually obtained chiefs, politicians, astronauts and even presidents. They like to be first in everything, to the person they are usually very meticulous and are striving for perfection. Usually, the elder brother is successful, but very rarely, "opens the soul." Expects a lot from his wife — a lot more than it receives in reality.

Ideal partner: younger sister of brothers who were to her authority.

Complex relationships: with her older sister sisters. Possible sexual conflict and the constant struggle for power.

The older brother of sisters

Compared with the older brother of brothers, with this type of man is much easier to communicate, it is usually very helpful to women and attentive to them. With men, it also gets along well, but still in the company of men he feels less comfortable. He likes to be a leader, but not authoritarian.

Ideal partner: younger sister of brothers. It creates in their communication just such a situation to which he is accustomed.

Complex relationships: with her older sister sisters. The reason is the same — conflicts over leadership. However, the habit of constantly communicating with women, possibly smooth out these difficulties.

Younger children

Next to the youngest child was always someone older and wiser, who took care of him. Therefore, the younger children often have problems with self-discipline, they find it harder to make a decision. This attitude to life the younger children suffer and family life. They want to choose a spouse for him or that problem. However, other extreme, tired of the constant care, the youngest child becomes "a rebel." In this case, it rejects any assistance seeks to destroy the "old world" to any, even the adventurous way. By the way, adventurers among younger children too much.

And yet the youngest child in the family is more often driven than leading, even if he rebels against the rules.

The younger sister of sisters

Usually this is a frivolous, fun woman, that does not prevent her sometimes be capricious or unorganized. At any age, she loves adventure. She likes to emphasize their feminine role — in relationships with both men and sisters (for example, it could "wipe their nose," before all married, as did Lydia, the heroine of Jane Austen's novel "Pride and Prejudice").

Ideal partner: older brother of sisters. It is easy to cope with it, because it sees through cunning.

Complex relationships: with his younger brother brot
hers. None of them wants to take the lead, and at the same time each partner was a kid little experience with the opposite sex. The more a woman's sisters (or the more closely they are related), the more she is drawn to her friends than men, although this tends to be attractive.

Best Friends: older sisters sisters

The younger sister of brothers

In the family of this little girl has a special position, and likes to keep it for a lifetime. It is generally optimistic, lovely and addicting woman. The nature of it is very different: sometimes it is the sort of "tomboy", tomboy, sometimes too submissive, and sometimes — too selfish. But the main thing — it feels for men is comfortable and safe.

Ideal partner: older brother of sisters. Both of them are well aware of how to deal with the opposite sex, and thus complement each other.

Complex relationships: with his younger brother brothers. As in the previous case, both partners are hoping that the other will take care of them.

Best Friends: oddly enough, usually men (friends or mentors). Women are often among the younger sister of brothers with jealousy.

The younger brother of brothers

Unpredictable, does not like long-term plans, living under the influence of his instant desire. If things are not going well, he usually just goes away because I do not like losses. Things used to get easily and often, so often becomes a spendthrift. Sociable, but it is hard to understand women.

Ideal partner: the older sister of brothers, especially if it looks like his mother. He is ready to accept her control, however, it must remain at least an illusion of freedom.

Complex relationships: with her younger sister sisters. None of this couple does not want to take responsibility for the children and the household.

The younger brother of sisters

Such a man is usually whole life is under the tutelage of women. Universal favorite and darling of the (often parents believe that the family must have at least one "heir", and continue to try as long as the heir finally appears, for example, Mafioso in the movie "The Incredible Adventures of Italians in Russia "). Due to its special position, "the heir to the throne," usually do not need to work hard to stand out. Take full advantage of his talents show up when there are a woman, having taken care of him.

Ideal partner: the older sister of brothers. She was just happy to take care of the "great man", regardless of the extent of his "greatness."

Complex relationships: with her younger sister sisters. Both partners are afraid of the responsibility for the children, so these couples often remain childless.

Middle children

This type is the most difficult to describe. After all, these kids are both older and younger, so typological features may overlap in their nature in a most peculiar way. He competes for life — with a senior, more skilful and strong, and with a younger, more helpless and dependent. The middle child is deprived of rights and privileges of the older junior, he is particularly sensitive to the injustices of life. However, it is best to average the children adapt to society, they are usually friendly with everyone and actively seek a friendly relationship. From the Middle children often make excellent diplomats, secretaries, hairdressers.

If the average age is closer to the older child, it will be more like a senior. And vice versa — the closer to the youngest, the more they are alike.

The only child

Such a child is both the oldest and the youngest. It has a very high self-esteem, and it requires quite a lot of life. Usually, the only child of lucky on most knowledge test and "logical abilities", he has the highest.

But he was not used to close contact with other children and often do not know how to behave in a relationship.

Only son

Typically, this is a favorite of parents for their pride and adoration. If the rest of the world treats him with the same enthusiasm, he takes it for granted, but if the surrounding perceive it differently, for it is the greatest injustice. By himself he feels most comfortable.

We only son often several marriages — accustomed to parental care, he tries to find a wife who would facilitate his life, without demanding anything in return.

Ideal partner: the older sister of brothers. However, it will have to come to terms with the fact that all her life she will be a mother for her husband rather than the wife.

Complex relationships: with the only daughter. Both of them are not used to close and equal relations with both want to end up as a child.

The only daughter

Simultaneously, too old and too childish. In many ways similar to his only son, so it is difficult to get along with him.

Ideal partner: older brother of sisters (if the type is closer to the younger daughter) and the younger brother of the sisters (if it is strong and authoritarian).

Complex relationships: his only son. However, many of these conflicts are smoothed if the couple has a common hobby or a profession. Often, by mutual agreement, they decide not to have children.

Best Friends: older or younger sisters sisters. The only daughter is usually stronger than the only son seeks to communicate.

Gemini

If the family has no other children, twins combine the features of younger and older children. However, if parents emphasize that one of them was born before the other, that sibling will take on the role of senior and communicate with others as a junior.

Gemini least seek to win the attention of the teacher. Siblings or classmates very little effect on them, because the twins are initially small team. Usually twins are extremely close to each other, so it is difficult to be separated even for a device of his personal life.

Of course, we do not in any way encourage you to change partners just because he will not come, "birth order"! We offer a new way to look at your relationship and see why they are such, and not otherwise.

Inessa Smyk

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