The first pregnancy

Someone of the wise men said that only with the birth of a child woman becomes truly woman. However, nothing changes woman's self-perception as much as the first pregnancy.

When is it best to give birth to first child?

Until recently it was thought that the first pregnancy should occur in 20 years — then, they say, and the body is healthier and easier birth take place. And women who are preparing to become mothers for the first time after 30 years, called the offensive word "old primigravida." But recent studies (eg, American doctors who observed about 4 thousand patients in one of theNew York hospitals) suggest that a healthy woman 30-35 years, the incidence of complications of pregnancy and childbirth only slightly higher than those of the future mother of two decades. In a sense, a more mature age pregnancy of understanding — because my mother is resistant to stress, disciplined, more wise and responsible.

It used to be that late preterm babies are born more often worse than gain weight, get sick more. In reality, this is not the case. And if we add that the parents of middle age, in contrast to the young, spend more time on child-rearing, it turns out that late children in their intellectual development often outperform their peers.

But, of course, late motherhood has its problems — primarily physiological. After 35 years in women more often have problems with hypertension, diabetes, and increased risk of fetal abnormality, birth of children with serious hereditary diseases. Therefore, all nulliparous older than 35 years, doctors have offered to pass additional tests — ultrasound, genetic analyzes. They allow time to detect chromosomal abnormalities of the fetus. This biochemical analysis of blood from a vein ("double" and "triple" test), amniocentesis (amniotic fluid analysis), cordocentesis (analysis of indicators of fetal cord blood). All of these studies with maximum accuracy can detect more than 200 genetic diseases associated with the violation of the chromosome set.

Scary!

Pregnancy — at a turbulent time, even for experienced moms. And as the first pregnancy and all causes flutter because of every step. What are afraid of the future mothers?

1. What if a child will be born sick?

This fear we inherited from previous generations. But just think — because medicine has leaped forward. A wide variety of tests and studies (see above) can detect pathology of the fetus in the very early stages. And do not forget about common sense and logic are not made like a lady of the old joke:

— Why you do not want to give birth to their fourth child?

— I am afraid that it will be the Chinese, because every fourth on the ground — Chinese!

2. I can not be a good mom, can not do it with your baby!

Most often, this fear appears in the only daughters in the family — they have no experience with the baby. If you have a younger brother or sister, it is likely that these fears you ever do come — you know that nothing sverhtrudnogo in this. After all, there is the maternal instinct that tells you how to deal with the child. If you do not trust in instinct, you can see the special training films, read the relevant literature. And a friend of mine during pregnancy dreamed of "didactic" dreams in which she studied science motherhood.

3. I'm afraid of pain!

Curiously, the fear and pain — things very interrelated. First wrote about this Grantley Dick Reid, author of the bestseller "Childbirth without Fear". He first spoke about the pain of childbirth occurs because of fear, because fear leads to muscle terminal (remember the expression — to shrink with fear?) and clip only adds to the pain. Therefore, the more we are afraid of the pain, the more we feel it.

4. I'll stay for life formless broody!

Look at the cover girl Stephanie Seymour and Yasmin Le Bon. Each of three children, and it does not prevent them from being in great physical shape. So here is literally all in your hands (and feet too). Now you can keep in shape in the pool, with the help of special exercises, stretching, yoga. And, of course, do not overeat, justifying outdated thesis that during pregnancy there is need for two. For women of different types of constitutional norms set approximate weight gain. During the first pregnancy, women should add asthenic type 10-14 kg, normosthenic — 8-10 kg and obese — total 2-6 kg.

5. I will never go back to the old, carefree life.

In some sense this is true, the birth of a child changes lives irrevocably. But in order not to get bogged down in diapers and pans, arrange with her husband (my mother-in-law), so that at least once a week they released you a break from the farm and the baby. This is an excellent prevention of postpartum depression.

Family Crisis

Booked — is forearmed. Keep in mind that the birth of the first child often becomes a real crisis for the young family. After all, his appearance changed family structure (when the second and third born children, it does not, all have become accustomed to their roles of parents, grandparents, and now everything has changed.)

The most common mistake in this situation — the confidence that you understand each other without words. In fact it is extremely rare.

Need to discuss your future life now — because redistributed and the role (because very soon you will become not only the spouses and parents, and your parents — and grandparents), and the time and money … Who will stand up to the baby at night? Will you sit with her husband at home together — even on the weekends? Will the newly minted grandparents let you two alone for a visit? Or are you the one you deal with the child and the household, and her husband — former lead, almost single life?

By the way, these conversations will help introduce you to how you will live after the birth of the baby, and get rid of many fears. After all, terrible, first of all, the unknown, and you will know what to expect.

Inessa Smyk