As a child commandment "Love your neighbor as yourself" I make me puzzled. Like this? In the Soviet school taught (and coasting taught and still do) that to love yourself — it is bad, indiscreet, unworthy. It should always be courteous, to put the good of the motherland and the team above their own, never nothing to brag about, even if deserved.
The result of such education is not only the eternal complex honors, and for the eternal guilt when you can barely afford to enjoy the victory or some achievement (well, as it is immodest!).
I think in your life, there was something like that. So, while you selflessly, trying not to let my mother plays the role of Turgenev’s girls together with guerrillas kovpakovtsem, any squeaky Svetochka or zauchka Shreds jump to the ceiling and clatter all that you have learned before them. And better. A teacher praised them for it. And you have lost faith in humanity. Do you take offense at all, and very few people want to be friends with you.
Over time, of course, you take yourself in hand and begin to look at the world adequately, I — that’s me, is my horse, I know, I know, and humiliated for the sake of others will not. Just out the truth "Love thy neighbor as thyself" conclusions of other: "Who does not love himself, dislikes and other". If you do not fall in love with herself, no one will love.
But in this case it is necessary to understand where the boundary adequacy, how to distinguish between self-confidence of self-confidence. I look forward to you at once: through this border passes almost everyone. In Mlada years unless a hermit, a hermit is not flattered himself that he is a genius, misunderstood violent and vulgar world (and not the fact). In mature age comes experience, and with it a better understanding of its role in the world, the ability to prioritize.
Yes, I love myself — take care of themselves and do not want to turn into a life crowded with grandma, even if I have not twenty-five. I do not overeat fried donuts and potato with sausages and bread and eat greens and fish. Let myself sleep. Hidden from the world, I turn off the phone and lie in bed in the company of a cup of cocoa, an interesting book or a good movie. I do not humiliate in front of men, not enough for anyone like the last chance. And most importantly, I listen to your own nature and your throat from the shore in order to step on it for the sake of others.
My natural intuition never lies: if it does not spread rot sorts so accepted". "what people say", This requires membership" and other nonsense. Ambient, ie parents, neighbors, teachers, colleagues, struggling will accuse you of being selfish, because you live the way you want. As if it is a crime against society. In fact it is not a crime but a feat that few people can. But everyone knows that one life.
At first glance, not so very difficult to live. But only at first. Take the Internet, without which, as without the drug, you just breaks. And there is to look for something there that really will benefit: relaxation techniques, recipes of Mediterranean cuisine, new places to travel. Alas, our perfect drug-social networking.
No need to be a sociologist to know how many people to climb, not for news from loved ones and not so close friends and especially any pictures or anything boring songs, which are constantly in the mood. No, instead of dialogue we are engaged in some kind of masturbation: believe "Huskies" for our records. The more "Likes"Better mood. And less is more frequently updated pages — suddenly not all loaded?
You can, of course, to convince myself that way to monitor their reputation, their image. But this is self-deception. The very look -Girl laykayut mostly terrible pictures of other girls, but still write: "The Beauty!" My serious status on political, gender or simply human problems paying much less attention than the news that my pigeon shat on the car … in time spent on social networks simulacrum of communication (excuse the buzzword), and in my case, even worse simulacrum — creativity. While the authors create new decent work, social-junkie like me flaunt status. So, they say, is easier to gauge the reaction of readers.
No, I have not deviated from the topic. This is a good example of false self-love. If you love yourself for real, then close your laptop and go out for a walk in the park, or read a book, or yoga classes. In our fantasies, we are all very wise — even those who missed the university philosophy and sociology, but in practice, constantly soared some nonsense. The fact that your feet thicker than Julia, and shoes less than Lenka — only 18 pairs instead of 20. And if a fad to rise above the rest, even funnier: "None of my classmates do not have such an expensive car". "I’m the guy earns more than the dog … a thousand bucks a month — it is humiliating". And so on. Examples Nevydumannye.
There are many pevichek and thirty years imagining that their voice gives humanity hope for salvation (about the repertoire, I generally keep quiet), molodyaschihsya businessmen expensive manicure which should brighten in the eyes of another status blonde extra ioltsentnera, shorties Directors, confident in the genius of each They got out of the phrase. In fact, these people deserve sincere sympathy. Prior to any size or blow bubbles of this side is always seen what they are worth. And these bubbles eventually burst, leading to neurosis, depression, or something worse.
Nezryazhevsefilosofy humanists together with the Dalai Lama advised a simple way to achieve happiness: love yourself, love others, be in harmony with the world, to build a hierarchy of their interests so as not to interfere with the other, then comes the painful hour of reckoning. A critical look at himself will never be over. Self-irony does not interfere with self-love. It’s all about balance — self-criticism should not translate into a set of eternal guilt that we somehow try to impose on those who have not learned to love himself or others.